View from the Aquarium, 3

Everything looks different when behind the glass of an aquarium. It looks different because your position doesn't change much.

I look at the tables and chairs across the way from me. I'm not at their level, nor am I at standing height, both views being the normal way that I would see them. I'm not sitting at the table, nor am I walking by; I am sitting in my office chair and seeing them persistently from a different perspective. The same is true for the walls (funny how the different tones in the wood look from here), the clutter on the walls (walking by they seem fine, but from a stationary view, the signs and postings look like clutter), and the carpet (if I view the carpet just a tad out of focus, I can find faces in it, sort of like looking at clouds). I'm sure that I would look different to my fish if they could get out the aquarium and change their angles of view by moving around. A constrained position limits vision, but it also provides a new vision when you're accustomed to less limitation.

View from the Aquarium, 2

Where as the fish in my aquarium at home can't limit my view of them, or theirs of me, by any means other than hiding, I can close my blinds if I tire of others looking in. I rarely tire of looking out. From this view, I can see how beautiful beauty can be and how nontraditional it can be; I see expressions ranging from anger to fear to joy to confusion to distraction; I see humility and hubris, confidence and insecurity. Oh, and I see some beauty, or perhaps I already mentioned that.

For every 100 women who walk by, there are 101 who I would like to photograph; for every dozen "characters" that cross my angle of view, there are a baker's dozen I'd like to chat with, if even for only a moment. For every familiar smile offered from acquiantances, or uncertain smile returned to me from strangers, there is a feeling of momentary connectedness.

I don't think my fish have those pleasures.

View from the Aquarium

A few months ago, my office was moved from upstairs to downstairs. I went from a "room with a view" to a "room to be viewed." Whereas I used to look out my window to watch trees, birds and the weather, I now look out onto an atrium where people come and go as they traverse the building for meetings, classes, entry or egress. I watch them, and they can watch me. I'm in an aquarium. This section of the blog represents this new world, this "view from the aquarium."

The Journey....of journeys

I'm at the confluence of three streams: reading "Blue Highways" and the lessons therein about the wisdom gained on journeys (of all kinds); attending the class at church about using one's gifts in service to God in service to His creation; and, collapsing under the weight of the burden of trying to keep everything under control (life as project management, as it were). The streams confluence has created a non-trivial disturbance that I hope will become an energy that will become a rapids of excitement and propulsion. But, for now...well, I have a crazy combination of influences coming together creating something new, and bringing me insights.

The overwhelming lesson on this part of the journey is simple: "Being confident is okay, but you gotta be humble." Yes, I believe that I'm called to do great things (greater things than simply success in the day job, or touching a few people with my presentations and imagery, etc.) and I'm committed to doing them, whatever they end up being. But....I have to continue to remind myself that no matter how powerful the call and how great the purpose, on a worldly, universal or eternal perspective....well, my work is nothing much. So much for "being all that and a bag of chips."

The streams are also carrying messages and insights that reveal and remind that most everyone wants to be recognized, affirmed and assured that what they are doing is important. Most everyone, I believe, wants to know that in at least some way, they are "all that."

So, where is the only place where everyone can (or should) be accepted as "all that" on at least one thing? The place where they are recognized as important because they are God's creation. That should be sufficient, but it requires faith, and active work and prayer to accept that the only "person" who matters---God---DOES belief you are "all that and a bag of chips." We all have a hard time believing that. We need our faith, particularly in these times, to find a place that says "you're special, you're loved and you ain't perfect...but that's okay."

The Journey continues

My fiancee, Kim, and I attended the first meeting of our first church study group together. The s m a l l group topic is a book titled "If You Want to Walk On The Water You've Got to Get Out of the Boat." It is certainly a topic that both of us are interested in, and one that I find particularly compelling. For all my belief in it, I still feel like I'm not getting out of the boat. I believe this class is akin to when one opens the bible to a random page and finds something that really needed to be read/heard that day. I pray that the discussions related to the topic and book are the inspiration and support that I need to get out of the boat.

More news as this takes hold...

More and more I feel that I still haven't begun the journey; maybe I'm still simply packing my bags. Who knows.